Kneading Faith
By Fran Lavelle
We greet another new year in the shadow of the pandemic. The surge in Omicron cases is the latest setback to our return to a ministry of presence. While it may feel like we are never going to get out from under the endless battle against this virus, we have come a long way since the early days of COVID. The years of 2020 and 2021 have given all of us tremendous opportunities for growth, as well as shining moments of hope.

This past fall, I read the book Leading Causes of Life: Five Fundamentals to Change the Way You Live Your Life by Gary Gunderson and Larry M. Pray. The premise of the book is that we study the leading causes of death, but we do not give a similar treatment to the causes of life.

The five causes of life identified by the authors are connection, the breath of air on which our very lives depend; coherence, the idea that life makes sense; agency, the human capacity “to do;” blessing, as a form of gratitude and a conscious effort to pay it forward; and, hope, which is tied to that which we are most connected to.

As one reflects on these five causes it does not take long to recognize how the pandemic has impacted our ability to be connected, find coherence, apply agency, experience blessing and find our hope.

This book was written in 2009, long before we could even conceive of a pandemic. The leading five causes of life held immense value then. They are even more important today. It is not enough to know them; we must live them.

When you see or feel a cause of life is escaping you it is a call for action. Increasing connection, developing coherence, identifying agency, experiencing blessing and naming our hope is within us.

One of the take-aways from our time sheltering in place was recognizing the importance of productive, intentional, lifegiving service, not mere busyness. I was challenged to look at where I see the causes of life in my ministry and my daily living. Gratefully, I discovered that the causes of my life are alive and well-forgive the pun. Chief among the activities that are lifegiving is my current role in working with the Synod on Synodality for the diocese.

The Synod is animating all five causes of life. I had the opportunity to visit Christ the King parish in Southaven for their first of several sessions. It was a gift to watch the process unfold. I witnessed the signs of life blossoming before me. The room was a buzz with friendly conversation and connection. I witnessed coherence as members of the parish were prayerful in discerning the Holy Spirit’s call.

In their responses to the process, I heard their call for agency in naming the positive changes they can affect. Blessing was abundant in their response to the needs of the larger community for those who are struggling economically, physically or spiritually. I left the session with a great deal of hope that we have been changed for the better because we took the time to stop and listen, pray and share, and dream.

At the synod session break, I was approached by a young boy, about nine years of age. He politely asked me if he could get me anything to drink. I requested a cup of black coffee, which he delivered with great enthusiasm. We exchanged a few more words and he went back to his table.

Over the next few days, I could not stop thinking about the hospitality this thoughtful child showed to me, the joy in which he served, or the way he conducted himself. He seemed far too self-possessed for a boy his age-or was he? I am certain I will recall him as we continue to discern our path forward as church. He reminded me of what is truly at stake. This young boy is not the future of the church, he is, as Pope Francis would say, the church of the now.

Finding a way back to one another after two years of separation, political division and unspeakable loss is not an easy task. The promise in our future is not that it will be void of difficulty. The promise in our future is that we do not walk alone in the journey. God promised when two or three are gathered in his name he is with us. With that hope let us animate the causes of life in our communities. It is our great diversity that makes us One, Holy, Catholic and Apostolic.

(Fran Lavelle is the Director of Faith Formation for the Diocese of Jackson.)

GUEST COLUMN
By By Reba J. McMellon, M.S., LPC
Mental health awareness has almost become a buzz phrase. You hear it in in the Olympics, certainly in response to the pandemic, and “Hipsters” are all into it.

Being aware of one’s mental health is one thing. Doing something about it is another.

Have you ever been told, “Maybe you should go talk to somebody?” It’s a suggestion that can set you back on your heels. I was told this during a conversation and my first thought was, “I am talking to somebody, I’m talking to YOU.”

Having someone suggest you could benefit from counseling can be off-putting. However, counseling is a valuable service and most people would do well by giving it a shot. But where do you begin? How do you find a good counselor or psychologist? It’s not an easy subject to approach. The following are a few indications that professional counseling is warranted:
• If the problem has been bothersome for years and no matter whom you talk to it keeps coming back.
• If you suffer silently and feel embarrassed by emotional symptoms that are uncomfortable to discuss with people you know.
• You have a problem that is seriously interfering with your quality of life.
Research has repeatedly shown the number one factor that predicts positive outcome in counseling is the connection between counselor and client. You will know within the first three visits if the counseling relationship is working for you. Do not let guilt or vulnerability be a factor in maintaining a therapeutic relationship that is uncomfortable. Don’t fall into the “it must be me” trap.

If you like your physician, ask if they could provide a referral. Your minister or clergy should also have a list of counselors they would recommend. An even better way to find a counselor is to ask a friend who has been to counseling for a referral. Referrals can come from anyone you trust with good sense.

A second way to find a counselor to talk to is through your health insurance. Ask what providers they cover and about their credentials.

Ask the counselor a few questions. For instance, ask about his or her office hours. Ask about licensure, credentials and experience. What university did they attend? Tell them just a little something about your issue, and then ask what their approach to counseling is. Sometimes counselor’s will only answer these question in the first session, but be sure to ask them.

If you are steeped in a certain religion that is important to you, tell them this ahead of time and ask if this would pose any problem.

The things you should listen for are:
• Openness to answering your questions. This does not mean going into detail about your presenting problem, just openness to answering your questions and concerns.
• Does it feel like you can connect with this person? If they give you the “willies” on the phone, they are likely to give you the “willies” in person.
• Does it sound like they would welcome you as a client? Haughty or distant are not good signs.
Prices vary due to the level of education but not necessarily due to the quality of service. Again, your health insurance may be a help in in this area.

The most important point is that some people are truly wonderful matches and others have the credentials and training but lack the style or personality you need. Consider going outside your immediate geographical range, if necessary.

Try not to be derailed by the “stigma” of seeking professional counseling. Emotional healing and behavior change can lead to a healthier spiritual and physical life.

The healthiest people I know are the ones who have sense enough to want help, to seek it out and stick with it.

(Reba J. McMellon is a freelance writer, columnist and consultant. She lives in Jackson and can be reached at rebaj@bellsouth.net.)

IN EXILE
By Father Ron Rolheiser, OMI
No one is an island; indeed, no one is ever really alone. If you are a person of faith or even just someone with a highly attuned intuitive sense, you will know that there is no such thing as a truly private act, for good or bad. Everything we do, no matter how private, affects others. We aren’t isolated monads whose private thoughts and acts have no effect on anyone else. We know this, and not just from our faith. We know it intuitively by what we sense in our lives.

How do we sense what lies hidden in the privacy of other people’s lives? Conversely, how does what happens in the privacy of our own lives affect others?

We don’t have a metaphysics, a phenomenology, or a science through which we can tease this out explicitly. We just know it is true. What we do in the private recesses of our hearts and minds is in some ways sensed by others. Every religion worthy of the name teaches this, namely that we are all in some real, mystical, symbiotic communion with each other where ultimately nothing is truly private. This belief is shared by basically all the great world religions – Christianity, Hinduism, Buddhism, Islam, Taoism, and American and African Native religions. No religion allows for a private sin that does not affect the whole community.

This explains some of Jesus’ teachings. Jesus teaches that it’s not only our outward actions that help or hurt others; it’s also our innermost thoughts. For him, not only may we not do harm to someone we hate, we may not even think hateful thoughts about him in our private thoughts. Likewise, it not enough to discipline ourselves sexually so as to not commit adultery, we have to even discipline the erotic thoughts we have about others.

Why? What’s the harm in private thoughts? It is more than the danger that if we think certain bad thoughts about others, we will eventually act them out (true though this may be). What is at issue is something deeper, something contained explicitly in the Christian notion of the Body of Christ.

As Christians, we believe that we are all members of one living organism, the Body of Christ, and that our union with each there is more than metaphorical. It is real, as real as the physicality of a living body. We are not a corporation, but a living body, a living organism, where all parts affect all other parts. Hence, just as in a live body, healthy enzymes help bring health to the whole body, and infected and cancerous cells threaten the health of the whole body, so too inside the Body of Christ. What we do in private is still inside the body. Consequently, when we do virtuous things, even in private, like a healthy enzyme, we help strengthen the immune system within the whole body. Conversely, when we are unfaithful, when we are selfish, when we sin, no matter that this is only done in private, like an infected or cancerous cell, we are helping break down the immune system in the body. Both healthy enzymes and harmful cancer cells work in secret, below the surface.

This has important implications for our private lives. Simply put, nothing we think or do in private does not have an effect on others. Our private thoughts and actions, like healthy enzymes or infected cells, affect the health of the body, either strengthening or weakening its immune system. When we are faithful, we help bring health to the body; when we are unfaithful, we are an infected cell challenging the immune system within the body.

Whether we are faithful or unfaithful in private affects others, and this is not something that is abstract or mystical. For example, a spouse knows when his or her partner is unfaithful, irrespective of whether or not the affair is exposed. Moreover, the spouse knows this not just because there may be subtle betrayals of the infidelity in the other’s body language and behavior. No, she knows this at a gut level, inchoately, mystically, because in some dark inexplicable way she senses the betrayal as a strain on the health and integrity of their marriage. This may sound more metaphorical than real, but I invite you to check it out in life. We feel infidelity.

We know some things consciously and others unconsciously. We know certain things through observation and others intuitively. We know through our heads, our hearts, and our guts, and through all three of these faculties, sometimes (because inside of a body all parts affect each other) we know something because we sense it as either a tension or a comfort inside our soul. There are no private acts. Our private acts, like our public ones, are either bringing health or disease to the community.

I leave the last words to the poets: If you are here faithfully, you bring great blessing. (Parker Palmer) If you are here unfaithfully, you bring great harm. (Rumi)

(Oblate Father Ron Rolheiser is a theologian, teacher and award-winning author. He can be contacted through his website www.ronrolheiser.com.)

IN EXILE
By Father Ron Rolheiser, OMI
Recently NASA launched the James Webb Space Telescope into space, the biggest and most expensive telescope ever built. It will take six months for it to travel a million miles from the earth, find its permanent place in space, and then start transmitting pictures back to earth. Those pictures will be such as have never seen before. The hope is that it will enable us to see much further into space than we’ve ever seen before, ideally to the very ends of our still expanding universe, right to the first particles that issued forth from the original explosion, the Big Bang, that began time and our universe.

Scientists estimate that our universe began 13.7 billion years ago. As far as we know, prior to that there was nothing in existence, as we understand that today (except for God). Then, out of this seeming nothingness, there was an explosion (the Big Bang) out of which everything in the universe including our planet earth formed. As with any explosion, the parts that were the most intimately intertwined with the expelling force are those driven furthest away. Thus, when investigators try to determine the cause of an explosion they are particularly interested in finding and examining those pieces that were most closely tied to the original force of the explosion, and generally those pieces have been blown furthest away.

The force of the Big Bang is still going on and those parts of our universe that were most intimately intertwined with its beginnings are still being driven further and further into space. Scientists are investigators, probing that original explosion. What the James Webb Space Telescope hopes to see is some of the original parts from that unimaginable explosion that gave birth to our universe because these parts were there at the very beginning, at the origins of everything that exists. By seeing and examining them, science hopes to better understand the origins of our universe.

Looking at the excitement scientists feel around this new telescope and their hopes that it will show us pictures of particles from the beginning of time, can help us understand why the Evangelist, John, has trouble restraining his enthusiasm when he talks about Jesus in his first Epistle. He is excited about Jesus because, among other things, Jesus was there at the beginnings of the universe and indeed at the beginnings of everything. For John, Jesus is a mystical telescope through which we might view that primordial explosion that created the universe, since he was there when it happened.

Let me risk paraphrasing the beginning of the First Epistle of John (1:1-4) as he might have written it for our generation vis-a-vis our curiosity about the origins of our universe:

You need to understand of whom and what I am speaking:
Jesus wasn’t just some extraordinary person who performed a few miracles or even who rose from the dead.
We are speaking of someone who was there at the very origins of creation, who himself is the foundation for that creation, who was with God when “the Big Bang” occurred, and even before that.
Incredibly, we actually got to see him in the flesh, with human eyes, the God who created “the Big Bang,” walking among us!
We actually touched him bodily.
We actually spoke with him and listened to him speak, he who was there at the origins of our universe, there when “the Big Bang” took place!
Indeed, he is the One who pulled the switch to set it off, with a plan in mind as to where it should go, a plan that includes us.
Do you want to probe more deeply into what happened at our origins?
Well, Jesus is a mystical telescope to look through.
After all, he was there at the beginning and unbelievably we got to see, hear, and touch him bodily!
Excuse my exuberance, but we got to walk and talk with someone who was there at the beginning of time.

There are different kinds of knowledge and different kinds of wisdom, along with different avenues for accessing each of them. Science is one of those avenues, an important one. For far too long theology and religion did not consider it a friend. That was (and remains) a tragic mistake since science has the same founder and same intent as theology and religion. Theology and religion have been wrong whenever they have sought to undercut science’s importance or its claims to truth. Sadly, science has often returned the favor and viewed theology and religion as a foe rather than as a colleague. The two need each other, not least in understanding the origins and intent of our universe.

How do we understand the origins and intent of our universe? Science and Jesus. Science is probing those origins in the interest of telling us how it happened and how it is unfolding, while Jesus (who was there when it happened) is more interested in telling us why it happened and what it means.

(Oblate Father Ron Rolheiser is a theologian, teacher and award-winning author. He can be contacted through his website www.ronrolheiser.com.)

From the hermitage
By sister alies therese
In England I was blessed to know an Anglican priest, Robert Llewelyn, who for many years was the chaplain at the Julian Shrine in Norwich. I lived some twenty miles away and went there frequently. Of his several books, a favorite is Prayer and Contemplation (SLG Press, Oxford, 1977). In chapter seven, he considers contemplation and the cloud of forgetting – some help to me.

As we age forgetfulness shows up … names, things, why I’m doing this, where was I going? etc. These seem quite negative and often cause us to wonder where we are on the dementia continuum.

I heard about a psychiatrist speaking before a group of seniors about dementia. Key to his rather clinical explanations was this delightful indicator. He asked how many had lost their keys. Most raised their hands. Then he asked how many found them? Most raised their hands. That is not dementia he told them. This is: did you know what to do with the keys when you found them? This caused some laughter and he laughed too. Holy forgetting is not quite the same!
This holy forgetting that Robert writes about is from The Cloud of Unknowing an old 14th century text, written by the author to a young disciple who wanted training in prayer. These ‘clouds’ help us focus on God in prayer. For example, one of the most important things to put under this cloud of forgetting is past sins, confessed and forgiven. Yes, they come into our minds … that distracts us. In Chapter 31 of The Cloud:
“…sins (new or old) try to cover them with the thick cloud of forgetting as though they had never been committed by you or anyone else …”

Robert then goes on to remind us that he is not talking about repression (nor was the author of The Cloud) … that is dangerous. “That,” he says, “is a compulsory and involuntary forgetting or experience of memories which the mind has found too painful to retain in conscious thought.” These are mental health issues to be sorted and healed in other ways.

Robert is concerned rather with trying to heal involuntary distractions (and even voluntary ones), so that we are able to pray, focused on God. “We are,” he says, “poor apart from God’s enabling strength and it may well be that this awareness is our deepest need.” (page 80)

Without this strength we can do nothing. Our goal is to ultimately behold God and in our daily life we see the many wonderful, unique, and marvelous works of God … but not quite God. What we want, Robert reminds us, is to come to the prayer of the Holy Spirit who “gives us the ‘best’ prayer, whether seen as being for God’s glory or as a meeting of our need for deliverance: twin aspects of prayer that must be held together.”

“But once our sights,” he concludes, “have been truly set on God, with the desire and intention that in God’s grace they will remain so, we need not fear these invaders of our imagination. What now becomes necessary is to pay them no attention.” When this is practiced, we find healing. “Try to forget created things, let them go … sit in the darkness as long as it takes … go on longing after the God you love, never giving up.”

Mark Lowry, Christian humorist, musician and writer noted this: “I look forward … but the memories can be greater.” He talks of how his PawPaw couldn’t remember much near his end … “except the Sunday dinners on the ground and singing in the male quartet. He sat and looked forward to the coming of the Lord … where memories and plans are the same. And I’m sure,” he quips, “over the door into heaven there is a sign: No Wheelchairs, Hospital Beds, or Bedpans Allowed!” Great things to forget!

(Sister alies therese is a canonically vowed hermit with days formed around prayer and writing.)

On Ordinary Times
By Lucia A. Silecchia
On New Year’s Eve, I found myself in a favorite small town donut shop in Pennsylvania. While many may crave more lavish year end celebrations, for me it is good company, hot coffee and a fresh donut bursting with coconut custard that make a sweet way to bid farewell to one year and greet the next.

The cashier at the donut shop was handing out calendars that day. The one she gave me will find its way into my office where, for twelve months, it will keep me constantly craving donuts.

In coffee shops, banks, grocery stores, churches, repair shops and stationary stores everywhere, calendars are scattered at the start of a new year. Perhaps, the paper calendar is in decline a bit as many live by online schedules and the ever-present daily data from smart phones. Yet, I hope that the paper calendar endures. It is a tangible sign of the gift of time. The calendars we hold in our hands, tack on our walls, keep on our desks, or toss in piles of papers are simple reminders to entrust the new year to God.

The pages of our calendars may already have notes about what is expected to happen in 2022. The pages are preprinted with holidays, observances, and the starts and ends of seasons. Calendars of a religious nature highlight the feast days and liturgical seasons that mark our walk through this life on our way to the eternal.

We also mark on the pages those events that we ourselves plan for 2022. We record routine obligations, vacation plans, birthdays, anniversaries, graduations and the special events and celebrations that we hope will lie ahead in the months to come.

Yet, most of the days of the calendar hold the unknown because the futures held in those days are still hidden. They are in the hands of God and will stay safely there as they unfold.

Right now, when I look at the donut shop calendar, I do not know which days will bring unexpected joys. I cannot predict what days will record meetings with students who have painful struggles or dinners with friends to share exciting news or newfound fears.

I see blank pages now where new adventures will take place and days that will be spent with those I love. I know that many meetings will be added to the schedule – and with uncertainty I wonder whether I will have the wisdom or insight to make the most of them.

I cannot tell now if there will be medical appointments on any of those days when I or someone I love receives bad news. I cannot tell which days will go well, and which will leave me yearning for the chance to re-do something I did or said.

I do not yet know if I will use the days of this new year wisely and keep enough time for prayer and contemplation. Somehow, for me, that which is most important never gets scheduled at all.

I cannot tell if there are days ahead when my schedule includes commitments I should have declined – or fails to include commitments I should have made. I do not know which days I will have an opportunity to say or do something that helps another along life’s path, or whether I will take or waste that opportunity.

I do not know which days might hold first meetings with those who may become lifelong friends. I do not know which days I might hold a newborn seeing the world for the first time or clasp the hand of an elder seeing the world for the last time.

Most profoundly, I do not know if, on any of the days on my calendar, I will ever mark a small cross – something my mother always did on her calendar when someone she loved passed from this life. I do not know if there will be a day on which my own entries themselves will stop because I cannot presume that I will have any day beyond today.
Perhaps when you look at your calendar you sense the same “unknown-ness” that I do. It fills me with hope and a deep sense of how much I need to entrust the 365 days on my donut shop calendar to God.

For all of us, the dark (but lengthening!) days of January may be the right time to briefly hold our calendars in our hands or look at them hanging on our walls and pray that the days they mark will hold only what is good, holy and healthy for body and spirit. It is a chance to pray, together, that we can be good and faithful stewards of the time we are given, that we will give more than we receive and that even the most ordinary days will be traveled with reverence for how extraordinary the gift of days is. With these hopes is a prayer that God will strengthen, help, guide and bless all of us embarking on our new days of ordinary time.

Happy New Year! May God bless you and yours.

(Lucia A. Silecchia is a Professor of Law at the Columbus School of Law at the Catholic University of America. “On Ordinary Times” is a biweekly column reflecting on the ways to find the sacred in the simple. Email her at silecchia@cua.edu.)